Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Roast

You could be sitting alone and still be the dumbest person in the room.

Special

When you ask the cashiers for the specials menu, and they bring out the autistic kid, blind kid, and Down syndrome kid.

Down Syndrome

I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I told my mom I wanted my first time to be special.

Kurt Cobain

Kurt Cobain's last job was a blow job. He blew his head clean off.

Christ

What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?

Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!

Kurt Cobain

What was Kurt Cobain's biggest flaw?

He had a short temper and lost his head over everything.

Michael Jackson

What does Michael Joseph Jackson say to adults when he sees them?

Keep away from me-hee-hee.

Dwarf

When a midget smokes weed, does it get medium?

Blowjob

Did you know "bj" ends with "job" because if you are giving a man a blow job, it sucks? But if you’re giving it to a woman, it's called "eating out" because it’s a privilege.

Dentist

My girlfriend went to the doctor for a broken arm, and they told her it should be better in about two months. I asked her what they said. She said, "It should be better in about two months." I then asked her, "What did the dentist say?"

Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris doesn't play video games. Video games play Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris

The bear rug on Chuck Norris's floor isn't dead, it's just afraid to move.

Catholic

So, I was in the church the other day, raping this woman, when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

Orphan

What's an upside of being an orphan?

You'll never get grounded again.

Stephen Hawking

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

Because his wife changed the WiFi password, because he was having an affair with his shoulder.