Worst Jokes Ever
I really slapped my pants at school today. This is normal, because boys also have their period.
What is brown and smelly? Is it a fart? Is it a carcass? Wrong, it's a dirty toilet.
I would build you a monument so that you would finally come up with clever thoughts.
I throw a flashbang in a room full of epileptics...
They were shaking in excitement!
My dad was such a good man. RIP, Osama bin Laden.
Yo mamma is so slutty, she uses a submarine as a dildo because it's long, hard, and filled with seamen.
I have a crush on my sister!
I saw two deaf people talking shit about me in sign language.
So I turned off the lights.
How do you know you broke into a gay man’s house?
The weird moaning sounds when you try to slide in the back door.
Followed by slipping in Kentucky (KY) Jelly.
Followed by landing in deep shit.
Followed by being totally covered in sea men.
What's the difference between ICE and ISIS?
One of them says their prayers five times a day.
I have a crush on a girl and both her parents are millionaires.
I guess that gives the term "Eat the rich" a whole new meaning.
What did the priest say to the other priest during baptism?
"We better clean our sex toys before we play with them."
What is the best item at a Mexican Burger King?
Hopper Jr.
Why does a Mexican want to learn math?
To study perimeter.
What's the difference between an office worker and a vegetable?
They both sit in "wheelchairs," but only one can get out of it.
If a deaf person is missing fingers, is it a speech impediment or an accent?
Why do leftists call their child Ariel?
So they can decide whether it wants to be a man, woman, mermaid, or washing powder.
Why doesn’t Jesus trust humanity anymore?
Because he doesn’t wanna get double-crossed.
Why did the priest invent baptism?
To wash their sex toys.
My mom told me that her doctor told her personally that she had to keep herself isolated because she has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great ass.