"I hate going to weddings, because the old lady next to you always whispers in your ear, 'You're next.' So I started doing the same to them at funerals, 'You're next.'"
Dark Humor is like a child with cancer. It never gets old.
Think everyone who wrote these jokes are dead yet?
A man gats kicked out of police camp after writing "Who's that Pokémon" next to all of the chalk outlines
Fuck it suicide is wrong but if you jump off a bridge and yell parkor its a failed stunt
My friend: Ess, stop with the self-harm jokes it's not funny Me: C'mon it's not that deep
I'd tell a joke about my abusive dad, but I only remember the punch line.
When I'm bored, I text a random number, "I hid the body... now what?"
My grandfather has the heart of a lion... And a lifetime ban from the zoo.
A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”
I remember my grandfather's last words: "Is that loaded?"
Why are priests called father? because its too suspicious to call them daddy.
I don't call it suicide. I call it population control
I wish I could say that my life is a joke, but I can't because jokes have a meaning.
What do u call a emo cappella group
Self harmony
A wife asked her husband why he cheated on her. His reply was “she was just lying there naked on the table, what was I supposed to do?” The wife reply’s “perform the fucking autopsy!”
Are you suicide, cause you're always on my mind
Does anyone still look at this if you do tell me if I should make more jokes :)
Wife: "Honey, I'm pregnant."
Husband: "Hi, Pregnant, I'm dad."
Wife: "No, you're not."
How do you embarrass an archaeologist? You give him a tampon and ask what period it's from.
