Common jokes
What does a pedophile and a light switch have in common?
They both get turned on by children.
What do a shopping cart and a wheelchair have in common? They both carry vegetables.
What do Jews and Black people have in common?
Living off welfare checks.
What do Michael Vick and John Wick have in common?
Got into deep shit when it came to dogs.
What does a kid and wine have in common?
Shit, I forgot, but they're both locked in my cellar right now.
What do a woman construction worker and a woman activist have in common?
They just stand there and hold the sign.
What's Barack Obama's favorite vegetable? It's Barack-olli.
Q: What does a slice of pizza and an F grade have in common?
A: They're both cheesy.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common? Neither of them can see their parents.
What does a gay guy and an ambulance have in common?
They both get loaded from the rear and go...woo woo woo.
What do my clothes and a depressed person not have in common?
My clothes don't hang themselves...
What does Kim Kardashian and the ocean have in common?
They both have plastic in them.
What does a pulse and an orgasm have in common? I don't care if she has one.
What do black parents and elevators have in common?
Neither of them can raise anything without a belt.
What do bicycles and slaves have in common? They both use chains to work.
What do fire and people have in common?
They will both eventually die out.
What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.
What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common They both get laid by Mexicans
What do ambulances and gay men have in common? They both take it in the back and go whoop whoop! :D
What do a bag of chips and a gun have in common?
When you pull either one out in class, everyone all of a sudden wants to be your friend...