When I'm bored, I text a random number, "I hid the body... now what?"
A emo texted a tree wanna hang out... The tree ghosted her
Window Problems A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won't open." Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer." Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now.”
So my mom sent a text saying, "I'm gonna need help carrying groceries when I get back." That was 3 months ago.
Son:mom can i borrow 50$?
Mom:What NO WAY what do you think money grows on trees?
SOn:mom what is money made of
Mom:paper
Son:where does paper come from?
Mom: . . .
So I text my girlfriend and told her I wanted to get inside her. Can you believe she replied: not again brother I'm only 8
BFF:DUDE, COME OVER TO MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!
Me:What no way its 2:58 am
BFF:but i just found my brothers secret stash of oreos!!!!!
Me:I'll be over in 5 minutes
I just got a text on my cell bone be right back ;)
My Mum texted me she had lost her phone
My friend txted me and asked me "Hey. Whts ur favorit emoji?" I said "😬😬😬😬😬😬😬" She said "why?" I said "Cause its your twin"
One spelling mistake can completely ruin your marriage
I accidentally texted my wife “I’m having a wonderful time. I wish you were her.”
Due to her death, you can no longer get a letter from the Queen when you turn 100. Instead, you now receive a text from Prince Andrew when you turn 14.
if u text ur crush and they leave u on read, just know that read has four letters. yk what also has four letters? mine. so that basically means that you are theirs. :)
Can all the hot depressed, suicidal, guys just text me so we can meet up and cry together about how depressed we r. For real
My girlfriend sent “a let’s break up text” right when I was done editing our pics 😮💨
I picked up a document and I started to feel cold. I looked down at the document and it read DRAFT.
*text conversation boy: when you kiss someone you burn 15 calories. Wanna burn calories together sometime? girl: are you saying i'm fat?
I love to have sex and my name is lex which one should i be with next i really hate my ex i just saw a huge t rex and i think you probably saw this text
Welcome for the rhyme
This is NOT my joke i found it on google its a texting joke Mom:Son youre grandma just passed away LOL Son:mom what do you mean LOL that means laughing out loud Mom:oh no i thought that meant lots of love i have to text everyone back!!!!
Why can’t you private text someone in a community? _____________________________________________
Because a community has more than two people.
