Worse jokes
What’s worse than running with scissors?
Scissoring with the runs!
Three men are outside Heaven's gates waiting to go through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them, "Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven."
The first guy says, "I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times." The angel gives him an old model pick up. The second guy says, "11 years and only once," and is granted a Mercedes.
The last man says, "20 years and not once. I loved her with all my heart," and with the angel impressed, he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later, the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says, "I know we are dead, but it could be much worse."
The guy looks up and says, "How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard!"
The only thing worse for a man than the end of the world is a testicular clinic.
Yo hairline is so bad, it is worse than Vegeta's.
What's worse than 3 babies in one trashcan?
One baby in three trashcans.
Your hairline is so ugly it looks worse than your mom's.
Your haircut is worse than James Charles picking a gender.
What is the only thing worse than being told you're adopted?
Still being in the orphanage at 13.
How do you know if your sister's on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes funny.
What's worse than fingering your sister?
Finding your dad's wedding ring inside her.
If Donald Trump gets any worse, they'll have to replace Air Force One with a short bus.
What's worse than 5 babies tied to 5 trees?
1 baby tied to 5 trees.
What's worse than a baby in a trash can?
A baby in 10 trash cans.
Louis Armstrong and Tork Poettschke go for a walk.
One says to the other, "My wife always says that icke is no worse than the other men."
"How many men does your wife have?"
What did the Joker say to Harley Quinn?
Nothing.
What is worse than a baby spinning at a hundred miles per hour on a washing line?
Hitting it off with a cricket bat.
Stories like Rudolph and Wonder show that different means worse.
What's worse than throwing a baby off a cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
Since it started raining, all my wife has done is look sadly through the stupid window. If it gets any worse, I'll have to let her in.
What was the worse purchase America ever made?
Spending billions on two rice cookers in 1945.
What's worse than having a comedian as president? Having a president that has dementia.