Roast

Roast Jokes

Insult

Ninety percent of your beauty can be removed with a Kleenex.

Oh, were you talking to me? I thought you only talked behind my back.

Hold still, I am trying to imagine you with a personality.

Comeback

Comebacks when someone say: Bully: "Your teeth is so yellow that when you start smiling you slow down the traffic." Say: "At least its brighter than your future."

Insult

Bully... you're such an asshole. Me... Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger.

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  • Face

    Roses are red, violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't worry, I'll be there with you, But not in the cage, but laughing at you.

    Mama

    Yo mama is so ugly, when she went trick or treating on Halloween 2016, the clowns thought she was their supreme leader.

    Ant

    If you had the strength of an ant, you could lift the pyramid of Giza.

    (Ants can lift items 20x their weight.)

    Cheerio

    1. You're so dumb, you think Cheerios are donut seeds!

    2. You're so fat, you could sell shade!

    3. You're just like coconut water, nobody likes you!

    4. Have you been shopping lately? Because they're selling lives around the corner, you should go get one!

    If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence!!

    Are these good?

    Mirror

    Me: Your ugly...

    Person: I'm not your mirror...

    Me: I never told you to be my mirror :p

    Bomb

    Why is America better than Japan at rapping?

    Because we're better at dropping bombs.

    Chin

    I was gonna roast you about your chin, but I didn't know which one to talk about.

    Wall

    Boi, you're the reason the Great Wall of China is a thing. You're so ugly the Chinese needed to block you out!