me: im afraid of random letters
therapist: you are?
me: [screams]
therapist: oh i see
me: [screaming intensifies]
Yo momma's so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology letter.
spongebob teeth upside down is the twin towers spongebob:9 letters squarepants:11 letters Sponebob did 9/11
Little Johnny was in kindergarten and his teacher said, "okay everyone, Tomorrow you must come to school and recite the first three letters of the alphabet". Johnny didn't know the alphabet so he decided to ask his family. He walked in the kitchen to find his mom on the phone. He says, "Mamma, what's the first letter of the alphabet?" His mom doesn't notice him standing there and says, "If you don't shut the fuck up right now-" So he goes to find his brother watching TV and he says, "Tommy what's the Second letter of the alphabet?" His brother doesn't notice him and says, "I'm Batman". So He went to his Grandma who was knitting and says, "Grandma what's the third letter of the Alphabet?" The grandma then realizes she left her biscuits in the oven for too long and says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!" Satisfied with the answers given to him he thinks it over and goes to school the next morning. When his teacher come to Johnny she says, "Johnny what are the first three letters of the alphabet?" "If you don't shut the fuck up right now" - Johnny "Who do you think you are young man to talk to someone like me that way?" - teacher "I'm Batman" - Johnny The teacher whups his ass and little johnny says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!"
Later that day he understands what happened and can't tell which was worse that he accidentally cussed to his teacher or that his family was ignoring him.
Your so fat you only know the letters KFC
Funny how Hawking rhymes with talking and walking and he can't do either. And first 4 letters of his Christian name spells step and he also can't do that.
Why did the polack try writing a letter with his dick? because he didn't have a pen to write with.
What is the shortest month of the year? May it only has 3 letters!
I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word “Mother-in-law” you get the words “Woman Hitler”.
Yo mama so lazy that the only letters she knows are NO.
if u text ur crush and they leave u on read, just know that read has four letters. yk what also has four letters? mine. so that basically means that you are theirs. :)
The only letters in the alphabet that you know are KFC
I tell my therapist I’m scared of the 3rd 9th and 15th letter of the alphabet doctor: oh I see me:ahhhh!!!!!
Why do orphans hate the letter FMD because F stands for family and stands for mom and D stands for dad
I see 6 letters in the past I have 2020 vision I can see see 7 letters in the future i have 2021 vision
What happens once every minute, twice every millennium, but never in a hundred years?
The letter M.
Sam is a kindergartener. One day, Sam’s teacher told him to learn the first few letters of the alphabet. Later that night, Sam asked his moody sister what the first letter of the alphabet was and she replied with “Oh what’s the point. Life is meaningless...”. Sam then went up to his room and found his brother crying on the floor. Sam asked him what the next letter was. “I hate you!” said sam’s brother, so Sam left the room. Sam went to his mom and asked her what the third letter was. “You stupid f*****” his mom yelled at him. So Sam went to ask his Grandpa what the fourth letter is and his grandpa didn’t reply, so Sam went to bed.
The next day, Sam’s teacher called on him to tell the class what the first letter is and he answered with “Oh what’s the point. Life is meaningless...” and the teacher sent him to the school counselor. As he left the room, he yelled at his teacher “I hate you!”
As Sam arrived at the counselors office she said she had called his parents and they wanted him to be safe and locked up in a padded cell. “You stupid f*****” Sam screamed as he heard the ambulance sirens getting nearer. As the ambulance drove away, Sam, in his straight jacket, was silent.
why did the rape victim stop eating pears?
because she was told that if you rearrange the letters PEAR it spells "rape"
What are the four letters you don't want to hear from a dentist?
I C D K
