Bath jokes
You know you’re getting fat when you sit in the bath, and the water in the bath rises.
Little Jimmy was in the shower singing "Dame Tu Cosita," and her mom heard it and went to the shower, and Jimmy's mom saw Jimmy wearing a bathing suit in the shower, and Jimmy yells "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP!"
John took a bath with bubbles.
Bubbles was a man.
What do you call a terrorist in a bath?
A bath bomb.
So, today is my birthday. Today, I am 13, but yesterday I am going to turn 10. But I am not even going to school to know the number ten, because one time at 10 p.m. in the morning it was so cold in my hot room, so I went outside to drive my car. But I stopped because the light turned green. I was taking a bath in the front of my car, and it didn’t have a bin, so I am taking a sh$t.
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Wanna hear a clean one?
Old man takes a bath with bubbles.
Wanna hear a dirty one?
Bubbles is the 14 year old next door.
Yo mama so fat, she has to bathe in the Pacific Ocean.
I just took an orange soda bath this morning. The next thing I knew, it turned out to be a river of Orange Crush.
What is the best type of bath bomb?
A toaster.
I wanted to take a bath, but decided to leave it where it is.
The way you are so ugly your parents even regret the day you were born.
The way you are so black when your mom is bathing you in the dark, she has to put flour in the water to see you.
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Yo mama's so fat, when she wants to take a bath, they need to make more H2O.
I bet when you take a bath, they give you the whole pool. No, better yet, the ocean!
Why did the rapper take a bath before his concert?
To get his flow SQUEAKY CLEAN!
What is the difference between a man peering through the keyhole and a woman in the bath?
One is rude and nosy; the other is nude and Rosy.
I just got a taste of Kingston, Ontario's only transgender restaurant: 664 Bath. A Dairy Queen who used to be a Burger King.
Why do Indians marry cows? Because they bathe in milk.
What's the difference between a nun and a prostitute taking a bath?
The nun has a soul full of hope...
What did the egg who was sun bathing say to the other egg? Don't look at my crack!
Where do rabbits take baths and wash their asses?