For the encore, we'd love to tell you a construction joke but ... we're still working on it.
Did you hear about the deaf guys STI He got hearing aids
What do you get when you cross cow DNA with human DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo
What do you get when you cross goat DNA with human DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo
Why are nonalcoholic beers a lot like going down on your sister? They may Taste but it doesn’t make it right
you're dad is so fucking fat that when he bends over and comes back up its the next day
I suggested to my girlfriend that she would look sexier with her hair back Apparently that’s insensitive to someone during chemo
Which is more disabling is it autism or down syndrome
Why did the rapper become a magician?
Because he wanted to drop some ILL-USIONS
Why did the rapper go to space?
Because he wanted to drop some UNIVERSAL BARS
Why did the rapper get a job at the bank?
Because he wanted to make some RAP DEPOSITS
Why did the rapper bring a map to the studio?
To find the right direction for his FLOW
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many PROBLEMS and not enough RAP
What do you call a rapper who's afraid of GHOSTS?
MC Shiver
Why don't rappers ever get LOST?
Because they always find their way with their GPS (Great Poetic Skills)
Why did the alien go to the rap battle?
Because he had some UNEARTHLY rhymes
Why did the rapper go to SCHOOL?
To learn his ABCs (All 'Bout Cash)
(Not originally my joke, I found this joke somewhere a few months back) An Emo kid in a tree falls, at the same time an apple falls from the same tree, what hits the ground first? The apple would be due to the kids rope and noose.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen! Ugh!“ The woman goes to the rear of the bus and angrily sits down. She says to a man next to her “The driver just insulted me!“ The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.“
Is Google male or female? Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
