Newest Wife Jokes - Page 10 - Worst Jokes Ever

What did the fether say to his wife you lite my day

i have an announcement, shadow the hedgehog is a bitch ass motherfucker he pissd on my fucking wife and he said he dick was this big and i said that's disgusting so im making a callout post on my twitter dot com shadow u got a small dick it looks like this walnut except way smaller

So I was digging up in the garden and I found some treasure I was gunna tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging in the garden

Guy asked me what I do for a living. Now I'm not old enough to get a job so I said nothing. He asked me again so I said, "Your wife" The guy goes to slap me but his wife is standing right there. She instead slapped me and said, "You swore not to tell!"

like if you have a boyfriend girlfriend or husband or wife or a crush.

A man comes to an assassin who charges $1000 per shot he tell the assassin my wife’s been cheating on me I want you to shoot her in the head and shoot the guy in the dick, when they arrive they wait the man asks why he hasn’t taken the shot the assassin says I know how I can save you $1000

Therapist: so what brought you here today? wife: he's too literal Therapist: and you sir? husband: my truck

As ruler of a kingdom, I wanted a knight. Duke Leo Pessi IV offered himself but wanted a wife in return. I offered him beautiful daughter to him. However, he slapped her and proceeded to wreck my castle. All this whilst crying “I don’t want princess, I want farmer” DAMN YOU PESSI

There are three people on the steps of Heaven. God tells them all he is having a good day and if they make him laugh by telling him how they died he will let them in. The first one said I just finished a long day of work and I get home and right as I stepped in I knew my wife was cheating on me. I searched everywhere and I couldn’t find anybody so I got a drink and went to the balcony and then I saw him, hanging off the ledge of the balcony. I kicked his hands but he wouldn’t fall so I threw a Refrigerator at him and I fell with the Refrigerator. God busted out laughing and let him in. The next person walked up and God told him the same thing he told the other person. God told him that he didn’t think that he could make him laugh more than the first person. The second guy said, so get this I’m a window washer on the 8th floor I’m washing the windows like normal and this enraged psychopath walks up and starts kicking my hands and then he throws a refrigerator at me and I die. God bursts out laughing so much to where he falls off his chair and he lets the guy through. The next guy comes up and God tells him the same thing he told the last two people and he tells him that there is no way that he can make him laugh more than the other two did. So he starts talking. So get this I’m in a refrigerator...

It's the 1940s

The chink was counting his shillings The chink was bitching His wife got raped in nanking The chink counts his shillings

The chink gets sook chinged!

I caught my wife cheating on me. I beet my son and grounded him.

wife: stop telling rape jokes, its not funny. husband: who raped you this morning?

This dad went out hunting, he killed a deer. He came home and he and his wife decided to have it for dinner but not tell their kids. Instead, they made them guess. The dad said "It's something that daddy calls mommy" The little girl yells to her brother "Don't eat it! It's an ass!"

Royal aka ZEPHYR gets cucked daily by Tyrone

ZEPHYR watches Tyrone give his wife the genes he could never give her. What a loser

At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, “That’s the fourth time you’ve gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn’t it embarrass you?”

“Why should it?” answered her spouse. “I keep telling them it’s for you.”

I miss my wife tails

the woman said stop but the man kept going so the wife just kept fucking

Chalie has an eating disorder and he is shorter so is his life but he will never get a wife he's a gay mother fucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?