Newest Snap Jokes - Worst Jokes Ever

shrek has a potato for a nose

"I ask the questions," snapped Shrek. "What's in your purse?"
"It is not a purse, but a pouch. Just some cold chicken parts."
"Give to me, purse boy!" Shrek yelled. "I will warm them with
my microwave eyes and eat them. Purse boys don't get to eat!"
As Shrek heated up his meal, the peasant died of seeing Shrek.
17

A failed marriage is like an Avengers movie.

First someone snaps, then half your stuff is gone.

Your hairline was sponsored as a Snap Chat Filter.

When strict parents👍

Jas: or shows a pic of my dead bf bc
my dad snapped his neck

i met a girl that was 6-5 and she fell on 9/11 and broke her arm, she really said ohh snap like a twin tower

Anyone else who snaps their biscuits perfectly in half?

ur mom is so fat thanos had to snap twice

Your so Fat That You BROKE Thanos snap

your mama so fat that when thanos snapped his finger it only got rid of weight

Ur hair line looks like thanos snapped your hair out of existance

The best snack

Me: It's so sad Ironman died of ligma. You: What the heck is an Ironman? Me: ligma balls. "snap" ^kaboom^

What was the first thing thanis snapped? Loki’s neck

Everybody add @christianisni22 on snap!!

Hes a hot babe and he's single

This is why orphans are dangerous with cardboard. They either start eating it or making into a house and halucinating that they have a family.

So I threw out the cardboard and said "You have to stay in reality. Fantasies arent real. You cant and will never get a home"

Next day they make cardboard parents so i threw that away and said "May attention to reality, you will never get parents:

Next day they start acting like parents and tell me what to do. Again I said "Snap to reality. You will never be a parent" The orphan responded with "Oh really?! How so" I just simply said "You don't have a house and parents. You literally like eating cardboard and then you make parents out of it. You like to eat out old people!"