How to catch Bigfoot: 1. Dig a large pit. 2. Build a fire in the pit and let it burn all the way to ashes. 3. Place small green peas all around the rim of the pit. 4. Hide in the bushes and wait. When Bigfoot goes to take a pea, kick him in the ash hole.
Lettuce stop making vegetable puns. We don't carrot all about them and they're not a-peas-ing.
A guy walks into a restaurant and orders Turtle soup . The waiter hollers “One Turtle Soup”. A moment later the guy calls the waiter over and says, I’ve changed my mind , I would like Pea Soup The waiter hollers “ Hold The Turtle and Make It Pea “
What’s the similarity between peas from Tesco and emos? They both have barcodes
Why did bella thorne pass gas on shake it up Chicago? Because I gave too split pea soup for breakfast.
Why did the carrots laugh? They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.
How do you catch a polar bear? Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole
What is the difference between a Chick pea and a Garbanzo bean? I've never had a Garbanzo bean on my face for my birthday.
What was the incontinent farmer's greatest problem? He managed his carrot patch but couldn't control his peas!!!
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
It's easy to roast beef.
