Little Johnny

Little Johnny Jokes

Johnny: Why do cuss words exist? Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older. || 20 YEARS LATER || Johnny: Mom now can you tell me why cuss words exist? Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them. Johnny: Damn Mom you shoulda told me that when I was still seven cuz now I really feel like that person.

The teacher was asking some of her students the meanings to words. "Sally, can you tell me what beautiful means?" Sally: "You.." Teacher: "Aww! How nice! But next time say the actual definition. Now, can someone tell me what malicious means?" Andrew: "A dangerous person and/or virus." Teacher: "Great job Andrew! Now, what does fat mean? Johnny?" Johnny: "A pig." Teacher: "Could you tell me the actual defini-" Johnny: "In other words, the person who last spoke to me."

Teacher: "If you're dumb, stand up." Nobody stands up. After some waiting, the teacher says, "Really? No one? There must be someone." Little Johnny stands up. "Oh, so you think you're dumb, Johnny?" "Nah, I just feel bad that you're standing alone."

Teacher: Little Johnny, why are you late again? Little Johnny: I had to be their for the birth of our first mixed cow, the white cow fell on the mud! (The teacher faints)

Made by Evie and Peyton and Peyton’s Mom

The teacher asks "who is a trump fan?" everyone in the class, wanting to be liked by their teacher all put their hands up, except for Little Johnny. The teacher asks "Little Johnny, why are you being different again?".Little Johnny says"Because i'm not a trump fan" The teacher asks "Why are you a trump fan?" and Little Johnny says "Because my dad's a democrat and my mum's a democrat so i'm a democrat" and then his teacher says "so if your dad was an idiot and you mum was a moron, what would that make you?" and Little Johnny replies "a trump fan"

little Johnny is my son and he got hit by a semi-truck owned by a Russian. Now I am on my way on a nuclear submarine with a burger king whopper to Moscow then take revenge for little Johnny!!!

Little Johnnys neighbour just had a baby he got invited to dinner with his neighbour little Johnnys dad said if. he mentioned ears he will get a spank so Johnny looked in the basonet they were talking about the new baby Johnnys mum said what beautiful eyes that is great said little Johnny. because he will be stuffed if he needed glasses

one time little johnny saw someone in his yard tying a rope to a tree and he moved the stoll and the tree broke. little johnny screamed. " HAHA Your skinny enough to break the tree"

One day, little Johnny was playing with his toys and looked out the window. He saw the neighbor's kid laying face-first in the grass. Not breathing. Little Johnny continued to shoot his nerf gun at the neighbor's big booty cheeks. No movement at all. After little johnny went to get a snack, he looked out the window again and the kid was gone. Little Johnny went to the neighbors and said, "I'm sorry to hear that your child has gone missing."

Teacher: Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up.

Class: no one stands up.

Teacher: Oh c’mon. I know someone over here is dumb. *teacher waves her finger around the left side of the room*

Little Johnny: stands up

Teacher: Oh, Johnny, you think you’re dumb?

Little Johnny: No, I just feel bad you’re standing alone.

Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning and his dad was making alot of mistakes. Suddenly his dad screams " bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant and his dad replied " aunts and uncles" Oh. next thing he hears is “dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks " what’s that mean?" To which his dad replied " uh coats and hats." Oh next thing he know he sees his dad jumping around the the bathroom yelling " fucking, fuck,fuck,Fuck" " what does that mean dad?" And his dad yells " cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh. Next week is Thanksgiving and the doorbell rings and Johnny answers it and says " Hey bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, dad’s in the kitchen fucking the turkey.- Someone very special that needs there joke to be seen