Invite

Invite Jokes

"Our teen has decreed we are the 'Worst Parents Ever.' We will hold our coronation ceremony to accept this honor next Friday. Invitations to follow."

My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgent coming in tomorrow im super excited to work with him the next day we had to do our first ever open hart surgery so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient so we finished the surgery and went out side for a smoke and we were talking I said why did you keep the patients blood on your glove? He replied we in my free time I test it for anything diseases HIV the next day I got invited to his house and we had some drinks I said this is amazing red tea what is in it just the 2000 people you have cut opened .

“Poor old fool,” thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink. The gentleman asked, “So how many have you caught today?

”The old man replied, “You’re the eighth.”

How do you get black kids to stop jumping off the bed? You put Velcro on the ceiling, How do you get the black kids down? You invite the Mexicans over.

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Irregular heartbeat. Heart palpitations. Arrhythmia. I search and search, eyes
scanning everything I can find on their symptoms. What is thie? Shortness of breath?
Chest pain? Dizziness? No. This is all wrong. Elyssa's cymptoms are nowhore near this
simple. ve seen it twice now. The screams of pais. Sickeningly pale skin. Voriting
biced. There is no other cxplanation, other than thas Renier's information was a
complete and atter lie.
This can t all be coincidence. It's not possible. I don't know how much of this Renier
is behind. But I do know this: There is something horribly wrong with this family.
And I accepted the invitation to become a part of it.
I can hear Elycsa screams through the walls now. I listen helplessly. Renior said
that he would be with her shortly. Is he in her room now? Why is she screaming even
louder than before?

Was invited to the inauguration of an I-pad. We were all ready to begin the event. I was supposed to cut the ribbons. But before I could do that, Penaldo jumped outta nowhere and shouted,"I DON'T WANT I-PAD, I ONLY WANT TO STATPAD".

shame on Penaldo for ruining the event😡

Little Johnnys neighbour just had a baby he got invited to dinner with his neighbour little Johnnys dad said if. he mentioned ears he will get a spank so Johnny looked in the basonet they were talking about the new baby Johnnys mum said what beautiful eyes that is great said little Johnny. because he will be stuffed if he needed glasses

So I went to a church and I ask a friend is the picture on the wail is Jesus and dose it have three nails or one nails Oh Wait that not Jesus he is not doing the T pose that he invited

How do you know when you are dating a cannibal?

You go to the beach, he offers to put suntan oil on you and the brand name is Wesson.

You are having sex and he says he wants to eat your a$$ and you notice he is holding a knife and fork.

He invites you to his home to use the hot tub and it is heated by a wood fire.

You are having an argument and you say "bite me" and he starts to sharpen his teeth.

But she hasn't tried the position with her new boyfriend. So she invites him to a romantic dinner. After dinner, she tells her boyfriend about her desire for it. But her boyfriend was clueless about such acts. So she tell him to strip naked on the couch and lay on top of him naked in the 69 positions. She starts sucking him off and starts waiting for him to do the same. But the bf didn't know what to do, so he just lay there. Suddenly the girl had an urge to fart, but hold it in because her asshole was right near his bf face. Suddenly she loses control, and lets one out. She apologizes profusely and continues sucking him. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another fart rip near his face. The BF throws the girl from the couch, gets up, and says

"Bitch if you think I'll be lying here for 67 more of those, you're fucking crazy."

I wrote a few jokes:

What does a 15-year-old boy do without two hands when his parents are not at home? Well, obviously do not jerk off

yesterday a girl from my job invited me to her home and there I had crazy sex I could not think that her mother is so hot

what will happen the morning after the destruction of humanity? Duncan MacLeod makes himself breakfast

I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?