Yo Leo, are you an interior decorator? Because when you enter a room, it becomes EMPTY
Y does rapeboat like going to the dog sheltr? It cheaper than a whore house
A guy told a beautiful girl "hey I want to make love to you if I throw 2000$ when you go to pick it up that's when I'll go is that okay?" She called her husband and he said "okay but pick it up fast so he doesn't have time to pull his pants down" Four hours later she shows up to her house and tell her husband "THAT FUCKER PAID IN COINS"
Guys I promise I’m not suicidal, I just like dark things. *proceeds to walk around the house with headphones in and stare at the ceiling while laying down on the couch*
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned
I can’t watch anime anymore when my friends grandpa is in the house
He hasn’t heard a Japanese person scream since the war
How is a marriage like a hurricane?
In the beginning there’s a lot of sucking and blowing but at the end you lose your house
Hillary Clinton is elected president, . . .
and on the first night she spends in the White House, she is visited by the ghost of George Washington. She asks him, "George, what can I do to best serve the United States?"
The ghost of George Washington responds, "Never tell a lie."
She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that." The next night, she is visited by the ghost of Thomas Jefferson. She asks him, "Thomas, what can I do to best serve the United States?"
The ghost of Thomas Jefferson responds, "Listen to the people."
She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."
On the third night, she is visited by the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. She asks him, "Abraham, what can I do to best serve the United States?"
The ghost of Abraham Lincoln responds, "Go see a play."
