What do you get when you kill a brown chicken and brown cow

Dead chicken and Dead cow.



What does the cow say when its going on holiday - MOOOOOYORK


Chris Castley

What do you call a cow in the snow? Chilli Beef


Chris Castley

What is a cow that’s good at Maths, good for? Meat Pye



A farm full of cows were bombed and only two survived. All of the udders died.



A cow was standing in a corn field. The chicken walked by and said annoyingly, “what do I see here? Corn beef!?”



what do you call a cow no legs

Holy Water


What do you get when you throw holy water on a cow

A Holy Cow



Q: If there were two moo cows walking down the street, where would they be going?

A: Home to see their mama! ROTFLMAO



a cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake



Child: drinking milk

Farmer: hey, what are you doing?

Child: oh I just milked one of your cows

Farmer: We don’t have any cows, we only have bulls

Child: realizes



Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.



Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.



What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef!



What do you call a cow without legs?

Ground beef!


the fat wolf

what do you call a cow with 2 legs

lean meat


random person

A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her class in Grade 3… The boy said, “Madam, I should be in Grade 4. I am smarter than my sister & she’s in Grade 4”.

The Madam had heard enough and took the boy to the principal.The principal decided to test the boy with some questions from Grade 4.

Principal: What is 3+3?

Boy: 6.

Principal: 6+6.

Boy: 12.

The boy got all the questions right. The principal told the Madam to send the boy to Grade 4 immediately. The Madam decided to ask her own questions and the principal agreed.

Madam: What does a cow have 4 of that I have only 2?

Boy: Legs.

Madam: What is in your trousers that I don’t have?

Boy: Pockets.

Madam: What starts with a C and ends with T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?

Boy: Coconut.

Madam: What goes in hard & then comes out soft & sticky?

The principal’s eyes opened really wide, but before he could stop the answer, the boy was taking charge

Boy: Bubble gum.

Madam: You stick your pole inside me. You tie me down to get me up, I get wet before you do.

Boy: Tent.

The principal was looking restless

Madam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you are bored. The best man always has me first?.

Boy: Wedding ring.

Madam: I come in many sizes. When I’m not well, I Drip. When you blow me, you feel good?

Boy: Nose.

Madam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates, I come with a quiver.

Boy: Arrow.

Principal: O MY GOD.

Madam: What starts with ‘F’ and ends wit a ‘K’ and if you don’t get it, you’ve to use your hand?

Boy: Fork.

Madam: What is it that all men have, it’s longer in some men than others, the Pope doesn’t use his and a man gives it to his wife after marriage?

Boy: Surname.

Principal: Ohooo !

Madam: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles with a lot of veins like pumpkin and is responsible for making love?

Boy: Heart.

Principal: Eeeeeh! The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the Madam, “Send this bloody boy to the university. I myself got all the answers wrong!”



Old.mother riley, had a fat cow… she milked it and milked it but didnt know how, she pulled his tail, pulled his tits… old mother riley was covered in sh!t💩

Little Johnny


the teacher asked the class what sound does a cow make mooo said sally good job said the teacher what sound does a sheep make baa said jack good now what sound does a pig make little johnny raised his hand really high in the sky the teacher called him he said the pig says get on the ground and put ur hands on ur head u black moterfucker



Q: What do you call a cow stuck on a barb wire fence?

A: Udderly destroyed