Newest Combat Jokes - Worst Jokes Ever

What is the difference between an Isis training, camp and a school?

Not sure I just fly the drone

President Biden ordered an F16 missile attack to destroy the Chinese spy balloon

Americans are thrilled. It's the first thing he's done to combat inflation.

Women have always been the
primary victims of war.
Women lose their husbands, their
fathers, their sons in combat.
- Hillary Clinton
MEN HAVE ALWAYS BEEN
THE PRIMARY VICTIMS
OF RAPE. IT HAPPENS TO
THEIR WIVES, THEIR MOTHERS,
AND THEIR DAUGHTERS.

Photocase

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? You pull the pin and throw it back!

Batman: Arkham Knight, developed by Rocksteady Studios, is the final installment in the critically acclaimed Batman: Arkham series. Released in 2015, the game is renowned for its immersive gameplay, compelling narrative, and stunning visual design, offering players an unparalleled experience of stepping into the shoes of the iconic Dark Knight. The game's narrative is one of its standout features. Set one year after the events of Batman: Arkham City, the story sees Batman facing the ultimate threat against Gotham City. The Scarecrow returns to unite an impressive roster of super villains, including Penguin, Two-Face, and Harley Quinn, with a singular goal - to destroy Batman forever. The narrative is dark, intense, and filled with surprising twists, keeping players engaged till the very end. In terms of gameplay, Batman: Arkham Knight introduces the Batmobile as a drivable vehicle, adding a new dimension to the series' signature gameplay elements. The game's combat system is fluid and satisfying, allowing players to feel the power of Batman with every punch and kick.

why are there so many scars and cuts on your arm?

Because its a battlefield

What do u call an autistic army special forces

“Remember switching to your pistol is always faster than reloading.” - Sun Tzu, The Art of War

"Jesus can turn water into wine,but I can turn your mother into mine " -Sun Tzu the art of creating war

“If your enemy is kicking your ass, blame it on the lag.”

- Sun Tzu, The Art of War

What do you call a baby on the battlefield?

Free shield

I was reading this in class and laughed at loud, i had to clear all my history of jokes

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little
bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the
Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids
on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am
trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire
US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another
target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of
which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my
fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that
shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we
speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across
the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better
prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the
pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead,
kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over
seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands.
Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I
have access to the entire arsenal of the United States
Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your
miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If
only you could have known what unholy retribution your
little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you,
maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you
couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you
goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown
in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.

John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather. Chloe says "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic" John says "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler"

What is the best shield to use during a battle? The emo kid

My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot and then they bumbed him know he called them the talkwakers

Who will win the war like for Russia dislike for Ukraine

The school shooter points the gun at the emo kid while the shooter tries to shoot him the emo kid dodges the bullets like the matrix and takes the gun away from the shooter and shoots him self.

A Teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular type of stuff.

But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. "Janie, do you have a story to share ?' ''Yes madam......My daddy told me a story about my Mom " "OK, let's hear" said the teacher.

"My Mom was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit". "She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife". "She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops." "She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands."

Pin drop silence in the class !!

''Good Heavens" said the horrified teacher "What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story ?"

"Stay away from Mummy when she's drunk```......!!!!"

dont make fun of the emo kid or he’s gonna bring his friends and you gotta fight the suicide squad

I have gathered intelligence regarding the Russian Forces that have been stalled in Ukraine for days. Apparently they are installing rear view mirrors on their combat Vehicles and Tanks in order to see the battle at the front lines.