Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.
Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.
Why did the baby cross the road? The car seat wasn’t strapped in.
What is the difference between women and cars?
At least one of them contained their value after getting wrecked.
My last relationship ended because I didn’t open the car door for her. Instead, I just went to the top of the water.
Did you know Paul walker had dandruff
Neither did I until l found his head and shoulders in the glove compartment
Police officers hope you’re a criminal. Doctors hope you get sick. Mechanics hope you get car troubles. But only thieves wish you prosperity. Weird?
A man is pulled over by a police officer.
The policeman approaches the driver's door. "Is there a problem, Officer?"
The officer says, "Sir, you were speeding. Can I see your license please?"
The driver responds, "I'd give it to you, but I don't have one."
"You don't have one?"
The man responds, "I lost it four times for drunk driving."
The officer is shocked. "I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers please?"
"I'm sorry, I can't do that."
The officer says, "Why not?"
"I stole this car."
The officer says, "Stole it?"
The man says, "Yes, and I killed the owner."
At this point the officer is getting irate. "You what?!"
"She's in the trunk if you want to see."
The officer looks at the man and slowly backs away to his own car and calls for back up. Within minutes, five police cars show up, surrounding the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half-drawn gun.
The senior officer says, "Sir, could you step out of your vehicle please?"
The man steps out of his vehicle. "Is there a problem, sir?"
"One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner."
"Murdered the owner?"
The officer responds, "Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car please?"
The man opens the trunk, but there is nothing there.
The officer says, "Is this your car, sir?"
The man says, "Yes," and hands over the registration papers.
The officer, understandably, is quite stunned.
"One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license."
The man digs through his pockets, pulls out a wallet and hands it to the officer. The officer opens the wallet and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
"Thank you, sir. One of my officers told me you didn't have a license, stole this car, and murdered the owner."
The man replies, "I bet you the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too!"
A lion would never drive while drunk.
But a tiger wood
I parked in a disabled space today...
...and a traffic warden shouted to me, “Oi, what's your disability?” I said “Tourettes! Now fuck off!”
Why did the chicken cro-
UM ACTUALLY THE CHICKEN CANT CROSS THE ROAD UNLESS ITS UNER SOME ROOSTER IR HEN SUPERVISION OR ELSE THE CAR WILL CRASH THE CHICKEN AND THEY WILL DIE.🤓